We can't very well have a good blog and fart-o-rama without knowing what we are all talking about, can we? We must all understand the Lingo. Interstingly enough, I looked up the word lingo and found this:
1. Language that is unintelligible or unfamiliar.
2. The specialized vocabulary of a particular field or discipline.
Well. Hah! I have a very particular discipline, it's called FARTING! HAHAHA! So, here's some unintelligible terms for you!
Juicy Flapper :
This is what happens when you have some decent PSI coming out your arse, it comes out with force. Only the Juicy Flapper has a bit of juice down there. Not really juice, like the stuff is wet coming out your hole so much, but maybe your are seaty or something? If it did come out your arse, then that would be just Juicy. What happens with the Juicy Flapper is it's forced out fast and because the cheeks and sphincter are slightly wet, it makes the noise sound hard. It flaps. If it weren't so moist, it would just sound normal. And many times it takes just the right angle to force it out right. This is the reason for the "stink lean" or the "advertised push". You need to allow for some flapping, or it wont smack out your ass!
Stink Lean or Advertised Push or "Lift a cheek" :
Call it whatever you want, but when you show others that you are trying to "PUSH" it out, you are making way for some good cheek action, and you want others to know it's coming. Watch out! When I lift a cheek, I am preping for some assageddon! And hopefully it will be loud and melt your nostril!
Assagedon! :
This is just another way of saying: "I am letting my man out, so lookout!" (You see, there are other ways of letting your man out, and this refers to the great Fart Ego!)
Fart Ego! :
This is a no brainer if you are a guy. Girls, sorry, you can try but you have little to no Fart Ego. Even you girls who are proud to laugh it up with the guys and rip out your own stink buckets, and even though many of us guys can smell in admiration, you still don't come close to the fart ego of a guy. This is the thing that a guy does. It's hard wired. Whether you admit it or not, you are proud of your weapons of ass destruction. And you will make it known like no other! The Ego is what we use to rate our farts! It's our inner guidance. The think that says, "Hey, that was an 8 for stink, but only a 3 for linger."